Wednesday, May 18, 2005

BaldNatalie: This one's for you, Toolstein


BaldNatalie

Based on the frequency of his comments, I conclude that Toolstein is my biggest fan, and I happen to know that Natalie Portman ranks up there with Katie Holmes in his list o' celebrity crushes. Thus, I thought it important to share this piece of information: Natalie Portman has shaved her head. And she loves the baldness. That is all.

7 comments:

Toolstein said...

I AM your biggest fan, T&A. And since Katie's herpes and horrible taste in men have bumped her from my list, Nat's up there at number one. Even bald. Pretty hot, if I do say so myself. Question is, T&A, if your blog gets big, does that make you a celeb I can add to my list?

T&A Lady said...

You may not be aware of this, Toolstein, but among the Official Rules of Celebrity Lists is Rule 32: "While the List may contain celebrities whom the Listor has known (in the non-Biblical sense) in the past, the List may not contain celebrities with whom the Listor is still friends." The Note to Rule 32 explains that putting a celebrity friend on your list would defeat the whole purpose of the list, which is to explore in a safe, amusing way which unattainable people you might like to dream about dating, knowing you will never actually do so. (For an illustration of the dangers of having attainable celebrities on your list, see: Katie Holmes telling Seventeen magazine she wanted to marry Tom Cruise when she was little. Yikes.)

So, the point is, if I become a huge celebrity and stop speaking to you, then yes, you can add me to your list. However, I will try to avoid that, though, since it seems that the people on your list are getting nasty cold sores and losing their hair at an alarming rate.

molybdenum1 said...

Very Sinéad O'connor.

tsvidogg said...

I suppose it's actually encouraging that it is the people who are ON toolstein's UNattainable list who are getting STDs and losing their hair, rather than those who have been--er--attained.

In any event, bald Natalie Portman actually looks kind of like a bald Jennifer Garner in this picture, no? Serious cheek bones... also, anyone else think she may have some teeth poking through her closed-mouth smile? hmm

Toolstein said...

Now, now, Tsvidog. No need to compare my beautiful Natalie to the Equine One.

And who said that they're UNattainable? She will be mine. Oh yes, she will be mine. (Does that count as stalking?)

Anonymous said...

I think she looks ugly. But then, I've always hated her. Love, Andrea

the schmoop said...

oy.