As you may have guessed, I have been in bed, paralyzed by despair for the future of mankind, since last Friday, when TomKat threw a press conference to officially announce that it had forever destroyed the romance of the Eiffel Tower by getting engaged atop it. The well-written and cleverly-titled Washington Post article "Ick-led Pink: Tom & Katie's Hollywood Engagement" pretty much sums up my thoughts on the matter, except that I would have picked something stronger than "ick"--perhaps "Have you no decency, Tom Cruise, you defiler of all that is good and holy." Or something.
Anyway, I was inspired to finally rouse myself from my stupor when I heard (via Dan's comment on my last posting--you're a lifesaver, Dan!) the FABULOUS news that Katie may be marrying Tom for money! As Defamer noted, in the least-blind blind item of the millenium a New York Daily News gossip columnist wrote that "There’s a contract. It’s worth $5 million. It’s for five years. There will be no sex. The deal was sealed June 7. That’s what I’m hearing."
This is the best news of the whole TomKat era. Please, Katie, don't break my heart by saying it isn't true . . .
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