Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Sen. Garfleck?

As the Washington Post said yesterday, Virginia Democrats are going batshit about the idea of Ben Affleck (who's shopping for a house in Charlottesville with his wife/baby-mama-to-be Jennifer Garner) running for Senate against Republican George Allen next year.

Now, call me as crazy as a Democrat who lives in Virginia, but I don't think this is a half-bad idea. Here is my rationale:

1. It's about time for Democrats to back slowly away from those lame "qualified candidates." Republicans have gotten plenty of mileage out of the whole entertainer-turned-elected-official thing (e.g., Reagan, Schwarzenegger, Sonny Bono, and, as this helpful site reminded me, Shirley Temple Black and several others), and if Democrats learned anything in the 2004 election, it should have been that personal heroism, honor, and experience can't hold a candle to name recognition and a blind faith in those who lead us into war. Ben played a war hero in Pearl Harbor, so that should be plenty to convince people that he can guide the country through a crisis.

2. Although he's from Massachussetts originally, Mr. Affleck appears to have a thing for red states--in addition to the house-hunting in Virginia, he also owns a home in Georgia.

3. He's got a pretty wife and will soon have a (presumably pretty) baby.

4. Ben is hot. Now, it's true that he has arguably let himself go a bit lately, but one man's flabby movie star is another man's breathtaking elected official.

5. Circumstantial evidence suggests that he has the personal charisma of the last successful Democrat, Bill Clinton. Specifically, he's dated a string of the most gorgeous, successful women in Hollywood (see: Gwyneth Paltrow, Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Garner), and this is not attributable to his looks alone (see #4 above). Also, as FameTracker observed back in 2000, Affleck has the fame of Johnny Depp even though he probably deserves the fame of Omar Epps, further suggesting that he's getting a boost from his own personal charm.

6. Finally, and this is where I admit I am going out on kind of a limb, I think Ben may be smart. For your consideration, I present what he said about the public's obsession with his then-ladyfriend Jennifer Lopez's sexuality in a March 2003 interview with Vanity Fair:
"Jen has had fewer boyfriends than your average high-school junior," he says. "In the physical sense, she's extremely chaste. She's had a much simpler, more easily explainable, more clean romantic history than I have. She can tell the whole story in 15 minutes, whereas I always preface the whole story with 'It was complicated ... ' I think this also has to do with race. There's a kind of language that's used about her-the spicy Latina, the tempestuous diva. She's characterized as oversexed. I mean, the woman's had five boyfriends in her whole life! She's a deeply misunderstood woman, in my opinion."
Now, say what you will about how he was fooling himself if he thought his twice-divorced girlfriend's romantic history was uncomplicated, but I think the rest of it is fairly perceptive.

So, go Sen. Garfleck! (The Reliable Post columnists at the WP say "Benator" or "Sennifer," but I like mine better.) If I had Congressional representation, I'd be happy to vote for you.

3 comments:

Andrea said...

baby girl is on the way. Jennifer spilled the beans, totally by accident, on some talk show last night. Just fyi.

TA said...

Wow, I'm totally behind--here I am writing about yesterday's news about Ben and I totally missed the baby-girl thing. If only I didn't have this pesky day job to distract me!

Andrea said...

I just don't let mine get in the way. My readers need pictures of giant squid and spiderman chihuahuas too much.