Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Giving in to TomKat temptation: Movie Reviews

I have big confession: after I went apeshit on TomKat's movies like a socially conscious 20-year-old at a World Bank convention, I totally paid $10 a pop and saw BOTH Batman Begins and War of the Worlds. And it was AWESOME. (Now I've ignored not only my own supposed principles about TK, but also the rule that you don't start a sentence with "and." And--haha!--I'm using bordering-on-rude ALL CAPS like they're going out of style. Society, I ignore your rules! I'm WILD!!)

It gets worse: War of the Worlds was BETTER than Batman. Batman had a pretty awesome villain, but also a very predictable retelling of the Childhood Trauma That Made The Superhero, an uneven tone caused by small, infrequent doses of awkward humor, and (SLIGHT SPOILER ALERT) an unsatisfying resolution, as in, they seem to have forgotten to save a large portion of the innocent populace, and mentioned this omission only in passing. Also, Katie's character, a kind of Elisabeth Rohm/Angie Harmon/Jill Hennessy/Carey Lowell type, didn't have that much to do. Katie also didn't have much chemistry with Christian Bale, which wouldn't have been surprising when she was adorable Joey (sniff), since Christian Bale's a freaky man and all, but now that we know she looooooves freaky men, I kind of thought, where's the beef?

War of the Worlds, on the other hand, was almost consistently terrific--it's a surprisingly realistic portrayal of human fear and paranoia, in a universal, this-could-be-a-metaphor-for-anything kind of way. The only bad part was Tom Cruise's movie son. Yes, that's right--Tom himself was GOOD! His character is kind of an arrogant prick, which is believable, and (KINDA SPOILER ALERT) he doesn't save the day, which is a nice change.

So what have we learned from this experience? My short-lived impulse to boycott TomKat movies was just as unlikely to succeed as my attempts to do many otherwell-intentioned things (brushing my teeth after breakfast, writing thank-you cards, working for nonprofit organizations). As a wise man once said:

Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Amen, Homer.


Anonymous said...

Point of order, Miss Out-of-Control-Sociopath: Being 31 does not make someone a middle age freak. Also, WOTW scared the living shit out of me. I liked the son. Tom, though, is just an empty vessel, onto whom the hopes of any weak man can be projected. Or something. I hate him more for having been in a movie that was legitimately scary as shit.

Anonymous said...

Hey, it's me again. I don't know why yer blog won't let me identify myself, let me own my fear and my middle-aged freakishness...Andrea

T&A Lady said...

Good lord, is Christian Bale 31? I had no idea! I take back the middle-aged part! I seriously would have pegged him for 44 or something. I think he messed up his skin suppleness by losing and gaining 60 pounds in a short time period.

T&A Lady said...

You will note that I got rid of "middle-aged," b/c I'm just that dedicated to accuracy. :)

Andrea, did you click "Other" and then enter your name under "Name"?

Toolstein said...

You know, part of the reason I liked BB was because sometimes innocent people just get screwed. No happy Superman character swooping up innocents in his arms just in the nick of time. Nope, not here.

Does anyone else think that Katie's acting skills have actually degraded since the Creek?

L.Ron Hubbard said...

We knew you'd see it our way, T&A. (insert maniacal laugh here).