Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Diet Coke breakup haiku

I went to the dentist for a second opinion after my the last guy used an alleged "tooth-density measurer" (bearing a suspicious resemblance to the buzzing mechanism you use when playing Operation) to tell me I needed seven (7!) fillings.

Well, the new guy said I need seven (7) fillings. He looked at my X-rays (whose old-school technology I trust) and said, "You drink a lot of soda. It's rotting your teeth. You have to stop."

Yes, I drink a lot of soda. OK, Mr. Confident-Sounding Dentist, I will stop. But not without lamenting my loss with haiku:

Caffeinated fizz
Perfect bagel companion
Light of my morning

O Carbonation,
Why must you be acidic
And thus rot my teeth?

First candy, now this
I will not give up TV
So don't even ask

Unsweetened iced tea,
Maybe you could fill the void
Left by Diet Coke

Who am I kidding
Nothing compares to D.C.
Adieu, sweet beverage


Anonymous said...

Ah, the delights of dentistry. But remember that teeth are so useful! The let you chew desserts, and the wonderful food Mr. T&A cooks, and smile.

I drink coffee, which has been scientifically proven to have no harmful effects at all. You could too.


Andrea said...

A simple straw
Like Paris and Lindsay use
Soda passes teeth